Friday, July 15, 2011

Some Days

Some days I hold my head up high.  I know who I am and what I am supposed to do.  I walk confidently through my life secure in the knowledge that I am an amazing woman who may not be perfect, but is doing the best she can.

Other days I crawl. I have no idea where I fit in or what steps to take next. I duck my head, shoulders hunched, hoping others just ignore me as I get by with the bare minimum.

I've been having a string of "other" days lately.  You know what, pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps doesn't work.  It doesn't matter how much or how hard I pull, I still feel like I am sinking into the mud.  I tell myself that it has been a year and a half since the divorce was final and I should be past this! I read books, talk to friends, search the internet and I still can't pinpoint why I get stuck in these "other" days. 

From experience I know if I just hold on and live life as best I can then the "some" days will show up again. And that the times between my "other" days are growing longer and longer.  But when I am stuck in the middle of the mud pit it really doesn't feel that way.

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