Brown Thumb

I've been playing around with Instagram and thought this picture of Audrey's plant turned out cool. We now have four of these tiny pots sitting on the kitchen windowsill. We picked them up at Target in the dollar section. This one is forget-me-nots and the others are pansies, sunflowers and daisies. So far the tiny plant at the back has died. I've got a brown thumb so hopefully they don't all die! Audrey was so excited when we planted them and asked every day if they were all grown up yet.

Camping

Audrey and I went camping this past weekend. Not exactly the smartest thing to do when it is supposed to be 105 degrees and we just have a tent. I had been thinking about taking a quick camping trip just to see I could handle it with just Audrey and I. The last three trips I took were with a friend of mine and we collaborated on the stuff to bring and chores around the campsite. What finally made me decide to go is that out of the blue Audrey asked to go camping.

I learned a few lessons and Audrey had a great time. That is what was most important to me. With it being so hot we spent a lot of time at the swimming area and I was treated to a spa mud scrub by the cutest masseuse.

We burnt roasted hotdogs over the fire and the marshmallows were so soft from the heat that they barely needed to be toasted before they were perfect for smores. I'll probably wait until it cools off before I take another camping trip, but now I know that I can manage by myself!

Some Days

Some days I hold my head up high.  I know who I am and what I am supposed to do.  I walk confidently through my life secure in the knowledge that I am an amazing woman who may not be perfect, but is doing the best she can.

Other days I crawl. I have no idea where I fit in or what steps to take next. I duck my head, shoulders hunched, hoping others just ignore me as I get by with the bare minimum.

I've been having a string of "other" days lately.  You know what, pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps doesn't work.  It doesn't matter how much or how hard I pull, I still feel like I am sinking into the mud.  I tell myself that it has been a year and a half since the divorce was final and I should be past this! I read books, talk to friends, search the internet and I still can't pinpoint why I get stuck in these "other" days. 

From experience I know if I just hold on and live life as best I can then the "some" days will show up again. And that the times between my "other" days are growing longer and longer.  But when I am stuck in the middle of the mud pit it really doesn't feel that way.

Stand in the place where you live

So, a lot has happened since we last talked.  I feel like I have been doing a lot of updating people on where I am right now.  Everyone wants to know how I'm doing, what I'm doing, where I am now, and how Audrey is handling it all.  I know this mostly comes from love, even though I have had a few "rubberneckers" drive by my life.  You know, the type of person who doesn't really care, but loves to hear about disaster and mayhem. 

Fortunately most of the disaster and mayhem is behind me, I hope!  If you want the short version, Audrey and I moved to Kansas in July.  We are living in Wichita, which is about one hour away from my parents and my brother lives in town.  I've got an excellent job that so far I am enjoying.  Audrey is doing great and has adjusted so well.  She loves being so close to Grandpa and Grandma.  If you want more details they are below the jump.

Hanging In There

Well, posting once a month isn't too bad! I'm better at updating Ravelry, so if you are just dying to know what I am working on you can keep track of me there. With Blogger's new "schedule posts in the future" feature I am hoping that I can sit down and write a bunch of posts and then have content for a while.

I've been trying to work on simplifying, organizing and prioritizing my life and I think things are going to get worse before they get better. You know how sometimes you have to tear down in order to make things better. That is where I am right now. I want to eventually be able to make my daily chores easier to do and free up time during my day. Also to have the things I need be within easy reach.

I am also trying to figure out what is really important and what can wait a while. For example, I would love to start so many different crafts, beading, sewing, quilting, embroidery, spinning and needle felting just to name a few. I also would love to have time to read and run. Plus keep my house in order and fix healthy tasty meals. And most important of all, spend time with my husband and Audrey without worrying about what I haven't gotten done yet.

So my brain is in a jumble thinking about all these things, and I don't really have the time to focus on any of it. But one good thing about this is that I am much more efficient with my time. I can get stuff done in half the time that I used to be able to!

Overall life is good. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful happy daughter, the weather has been beautiful lately, I have a job I enjoy, and I am blessed in so many different ways. So why do some days I still feel like this little squirrel?

This little guy lives in one of the parking garages in St Paul. One day I saw him hanging upside down!

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Ironic

I have so much to write about and no time to write! So a list will have to do for now.

• Chris knit Audrey a beautiful sweater! It fits great. Chris, I'll send a picture soon. I promise!
• Finished a second Two Color Brioche Scarf. Used different yarns, but one is still a Noro yarn. Had to make a few changes to the pattern, but it is still basically the same.
• Finished the final thumb on a pair of mittens I started before Audrey was born. Glad I waited. Was able to figure out why the first mitten didn't fit very well. I made the thumb too short!
• Finished a pair of socks and started another pair.
• Went to Shepherd's Harvest and got a few odds and ends. Needle felting fiber, niddy noddy, basic Kumihimo Braid kit, and wool felt.
• Made a couple bibs for my nephew. Really need to work on my sewing skills! Too ashamed to post pictures.
• Started swatching for the Ruffled Surplice, without the ruffle! It was on the cover of Interweave Knits Spring 2007. I got the yarn, Tahki Bali, for 40% off at Webs. I got one of the discontinued colors -06- which is a beautiful teal/turquoise.
• Started attending a knitting group in downtown St. Paul. We meet every Tuesday during lunch time. Fun group of people!
• Still managing to resist spinning. My LYS is making it harder now that they are carrying spinning wheels and fiber!
• Started "running" again. If only running 3 min at a time can be called running.
• Visited family in both Kansas and Oklahoma. It is amazing how much I miss that place.
• Audrey has starting army crawling and pulling up on things. Time to baby proof!

Overall life is very good if busy. I am trying to cut out the extra stuff that is not needed, but I think knitting and blogging will always stay. Even if I can't do them as often as I want!

Sunshine

Sunshine
Originally uploaded by rlmoore1

It looks like spring may have finally arrived! It is supposed to be in the 50s this weekend! I can't wait to take Audrey for a walk.

Dread

Exactly a month from today I go back to work. Actually by the time I get this posted it will probably be less than a month. I am so loving being a stay at home mom. It is so hard for me to write about this. I cry every time I even think about it. Both my husband and I would love it if I could stay home with Audrey, but no matter how creative we get with finances there is just no way. I really do feel like my place is in the home. I can't believe that God would give me such a strong desire to be at home if it will never happen.

While it is hard for me to think about going back to work, I do have a sense of peace about it. God arranged the situation so I would know for sure that I should return to work. The position I held before I got pregnant involved travel. And that travel could be at short notice and frequent. I always said that I would change jobs once I had kids, but I knew I wouldn't find another job with the same salary and security. Well, a couple months after I got pregnant I was offered a position at work doing something that I had wanted to do for 5 years. This new postion is so great, and it has much less travel. Two times a year instead of possibly once a month. So that solved the job issue.

I can't believe that God would open up this golden opportunity if I wasn't supposed to stay at work. I feel like God is telling me to do this job for a while, but to not give up hope. So far in my life God has been pretty clear on what direction he wants me to take. I may not always like it, but I know without a doubt that he has what is best for me in mind.

Romans 8:28